The latest “press sluts” stunt by People for the Ethical Treatment of Animals (PETA) may just take the (no-egg) cake for a combination of audacity and pointlessness. The group that would take away your right to eat bacon and eggs, watch performing elephants and whales, wear leather, fur, or wool, or take advantage of lifesaving medical advancements developed by animal trials is positioning itself as an advocate for shelter pets by demanding that the Monopoly game’s Scotty dog token be changed to a mutt.

Mutts may be adorable, but they have no ally in PETA. After all, PETA kills the vast majority — frequently over 90 percent in a given year — of the dogs and cats it takes in at its Virginia animal shelter. According to records filed with the Commonwealth, PETA has killed nearly 28,000 shelter pets since 1998. Perhaps before it tries to “rescue” a pewter pooch, it should rescue the puppies right under its nose.

But would it? PETA—like its comrades-in-“fakon” at the Humane Society of the United States—may make a point of standing up for pets, but its real ideology of “total animal liberation” would make all pets cease to exist.

Don’t believe us? Listen to PETA President Ingrid Newkirk, who has said that in her utopia “companion animals [pets] would be phased out.” You could also ask the PETA staffer who called upon a Florida region to become a “no-birth community” or the PETA officials who publicly objected to Norfolk, Virginia’s plan to reduce euthanasia at the city animal shelter. (Who needs a so-called “animal shelter” that kills over 90 percent of the pets in its care if the city pound does a better job of promoting adoptions?)

After all, North Carolina trial records show that PETA staff had no problem killing dogs and cats they classified as “adorable” and “perfect.” It’s probably good for both Scotty dogs and mutts both that PETA keeps away from them. Their brothers and sisters who have had the misfortune of getting too close to PETA have not generally lasted very long. In Monopoly, at least, PETA should go directly to jail.